Reality check. I started this website so people would have an opportunity to read what I write. So I write every day. Even when there doesn’t seem to be anything much to write about. It’s a challenge that I refuse to back down from. No matter how tired, no matter how busy, no matter how deep the writer’s block goes, I will come up with something to entertain the people who grace my website with their daily presence.
But I can’t forget that at the core, I am a fiction writer. I have finished two books that I am trying to find publishers for (sample chapters availble on the books page) And three more that are more than half way finished. I suppose I could have tried harder. Admittedly, I haven’t tried very hard. I wrote query letters, but after some well timed advice, I decided to start a website and a blog before sending the rest of the queries out. Well, here we are. I have a website. I have a blog. And I have a fairly nice following. I’m well on my way! But I still have to keep writing. I have three books to finish. So tonight I’m devoting my blog time to just writing.
In the middle of the chaos that was my Sunday, I was checking on the comments left on the daily blog (I actually do read all of the comments.) I was surprised to find a fairly unkind remark made by a random reader telling me that I was pathetic, and my life was pathetic, and my blog was pathetic, and I should stop writing, put down the cookies and get some exercise. My first thought was, let’s delete this post—which I quickly did. But then I had second thoughts. Maybe I should have left the comment up for my devoted fans to read. I’m sure at least someone would have said, “Wow, who the hell are you?” Because, while my life may be chaotic, it’s hardly pathetic—outside of the random moments that we all inevitably have from time to time. Aside from writing my blog, and my books, I am also the mother of four relatively intelligent children, three of which are on the home stretch of adulthood—one of those three is arguably already there. I am also a full time business banker (and bank officer) for a very big bank, and I’m pretty good at what I do. Certainly not the stuff of pathetic existences the world over.
I suppose my initial reaction was to have hurt feelings over that comment, but after careful consideration, I actually find it funny. For anyone to think that my blog is meant to be a serious look at my life rather than what it is—a humorous look at those moments in everyone’s life where things just don’t go the way you would have liked. Sure, I’m clumsy…and accident prone…and I have probably eaten too many Girl Scout cookies this year, but I’m inclined to laugh at my shortcomings rather than cry over them. So consider this a boisterous shout out to all of my family, friends, readers and fans who have ever had one of those moments where somebody, somewhere, may have called you pathetic. Life can often be a fuck sandwich, and we can either choke on it, or enjoy the hell out of it. I, for one, would prefer to squeeze every drop of joy out of every minute I draw breath. So if someone decides to find that pathetic, that’s ok. I’m fine with that. After all, I have a blog to write. And books to finish. And kids to feed. And dogs to walk. And a husband to cuddle with. And because today is the first day of daylight savings time, I have one less hour in the day to do it in. I’d better get cracking!
Until the next time…I’ll be writing!