of course you realize this means war!

Ever since I woke up this morning, I've been quoting Bugs Bunny. I have no idea why...it's just coming out that way. My thoughts as I woke to a freezing cold house were, "This doesn't look like Pismo Beach! I knew I should have made that left turn at Albuquerque." My hus...I mean my imaginary dead president, Mr. Lincoln, doesn't see the humor in such things, but I soldier on just the same. Humor is subjective.

Especially when the subject is mice.

So, when I opened up my silverware drawer to discover it was filled with mouse droppings, the Bugs Bunny-isms came out in full force. Most especially, "Of course, you realize, this means war."

And I'm not kidding. I am officially at war with a mouse. Or mice. I have no idea what I'm up against, but the sudden urge to Google Acme products is overwhelming.

Until recently, I was totally against using extreme measures to eradicate our uninvited guests, preferring to let the cats have a little fun, hunting them down like the wild animals they fancy themselves to be. But I've since had a change of heart. All of a sudden, I'm ready to go all Rambo on the little bastards.

So today, I'm on a quest for traps, and I'm just a little embarrassed to say I actually did Google Acme road runner traps. But I didn't take any of them seriously. Ok, so the giant cheese wedge costume had me thinking for a minute, but I blame that on the cold and the hour. I didn't get much sleep last night.

I guess I'll just stick with the standard glue strips and old fashioned spring loaded mouse traps that worked so well for Tom when he was trying to catch Jerry. (Note the sarcasm here. Tom never did catch Jerry, and I'm afraid I'll have much the same luck catching Mr. Mouse King and his little shit subjects.)

Can I just say someone needs to build a better mousetrap?

I guess it'll all be ok as long as I don't go too crazy and pull out the heavy artillery the way Nathan Lane did in Mouse Hunt. With my luck, I would blow up the house. And that would totally ruin my day.

And to quote Bugs, "Don't take life too seriously. You'll never get out alive."

Until the next time...Shhh...I'll be hunting mice!

Copyright © 2000-2018, Erica Lucke Dean. All rights reserved. Any retranscription or reproduction is prohibited and illegal.
Posted on February 18, 2013 .