Erica Lucke Dean

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a catastrophic loss of duck

Well, it finally happened. Our last duck was taken by the unseen entity, or zombie garden gnome, as I like to refer to it. My hus...IDP refers to it as "The Fox." So we're officially duckless on the Leaning Duck Farm. (That's the official name, by the way.) I say we need to immediately replenish the duck supply (and add a few more chickens because we lost two more of those too) but the head honcho...the guy with the money...Mr. Lincoln himself, say, nope. Not so fast. First we need to fortify the perimeter. Secure the safety and well-being of said ducks, chickens, and assorted other animals around here...blah, blah, blah.

I say it's a bit late for that. Shouldn't we have secured the perimeter and fortified the electric surveillance ​stuff while we still had ducks to save?

But hey, what do I know? I'm not cut out for farming, remember? Unless the pigs are starving. And I'm beginning to see a pattern of me being asked to feed the pigs right around the same time I do something to make a certain someone annoyed with me. Coincidence? I don't think so.​ Let's just say, I'm going to start keeping track. To be safe, you know? Accidents happen and all that.

For now, I'm just going to steer clear of the pigs, and coach the chickens to roost up high until we get the fence situation handled. And then, who knows...another batch or two of ducks sounds like a good place to start.

Until the next time...I'll be watching for garden gnomes around every corner.​