all it takes is a little determination

So, if you’ve been paying attention, you know I’ve been having a bit of an issue with my printer lately. And seriously, how hard can it be to print something, anyway?

Harder than it would seem, apparently.

Remember how over Thanksgiving, I trudged out to Walmart…twice in one day, twenty miles in each direction…to get ink, only to run out of the one color I didn’t buy. Well, fast forward a week or so, and my need to print something became more than just pressing…it became life changing. Overly dramatic, you say? Perhaps, but work with me for a minute.

So, on Friday, I asked my husband to pick up the black ink on his way home from his unscheduled (yet unavoidable) trip to Florida to visit family. Unfortunately, he didn’t get home in time for me to print and rush to the post office, so I had no choice but to wait until Monday. So first thing Monday morning, I flew out of bed and ran to the printer. (Yeah, I’m lying again. I dragged myself out of bed around 10:30, but that’s still morning. Don’t judge me.) I plugged the printer into the power, then connected the USB to my laptop, loaded it with paper and pulled up the file I needed to print. (I’ll get to this in a minute…be patient.)

What I didn’t do was realize I had an unfinished print job from when I ran out of ink. I also didn’t realize the paper tray was shut, thus preventing the printed pages from escaping the machine. Yep…paper jam. Wicked awful paper jam, in fact. But I had this…I snatched the trapped papers, yanking them out without missing a beat. And without turning off the power like the warning message said. Apparently, that was very bad. All attempts to print after this were blurry. And not just blurry, but sort of like drunken ramblings. The words were all over the page.

And it was now creeping up on afternoon and my document had to be printed, notarized and mailed before the post office closed.

I won’t bore you with the torturous measures I put my poor printer through, but I will say, it won’t screw with me again.

So, an hour (and several unusable copies) later, I rushed out the door, with my perfectly legible document in hand, to find a notary public in this one horse tourist town I live in. After calling the only mailbox store, the local grocery store and a few other usual suspects, I was informed the only place to get a notary done would be at a school or a bank, and since I wasn’t about to wander the halls of the local high school, I decided to visit the bank. Lucky for me, they weren’t picky about helping a non-customer. I should have asked them for directions to the post office, because the last stop on my little journey turned into a scavenger hunt. Don’t get me wrong, I love a good scavenger hunt, but not when I’m on a tight schedule.

With my letter finally signed, notarized and safely mailed away, I breathed a huge sigh of relief and hit up the local Sonic for a smoothie and some onion rings. (Hey, scavenger hunts always work up a good appetite.)

So, I’ll bet you’re wondering what was so damned important that I had to wrestle an ornery printer, visit a bank I don’t do business with, and drive around like a rat in a maze searching for the post office on a Monday afternoon.

Remember last week when I said I had a secret, but I couldn’t announce it yet? Well, I can announce it now. That little document I worked so hard to print and mail just happens to be the contract to publish my book, To Katie With Love. So yeah, it was worth every eff bomb I dropped and every calorie in those onion rings. I’m going to be a published author. And that is just the coolest thing ever.

Until the next time…I’ll be buying a back up printer.

Copyright © 2000-2018, Erica Lucke Dean. All rights reserved. Any retranscription or reproduction is prohibited and illegal.
Posted on December 3, 2012 .