beauty is only skin deep

It was a wonderful Saturday off.  I spent the entire day preparing my house for my second annual Twilight party.  I was so busy readying the house, and the food, and the movie that I didn’t bother to get ready myself.  There just never seems to be enough time in the day.  It was my closest friends coming over, so I knew I don’t need to go overboard, but it would have been nice to at least look nice. 

I didn’t look so nice.  My hair wasn’t fixed, I wasn’t wearing make-up, and I was wearing baggy jeans with a t-shirt.  But seriously, I’ve spent too many hours of my life being concerned with my looks.  Once upon a time, I was a single girl looking for my Mr. Right.  Back then, I spared no effort to look beyond my best. 

Thank God those days are over!

Dating in itself is a dangerous excursion destined to bring out the awkwardness in all of us.  And I don’t think anyone would argue the issue of my innate awkwardness.  As a general rule, men have it comparatively easy when it comes to dating.  They just have to shower, brush their teeth, apply deodorant and dress in clean clothes.  And, to all you men out there, this is not merely a suggestion, but a hard and fast rule.  You MUST shower, brush your teeth, apply deodorant and dress appropriately before ringing our doorbell.  I can’t even count the number of men I know who root through the dirty laundry pile for something to wear.  Needless to say, this is not an acceptable practice.  Your task of getting ready is a fairly simple one to begin with and taking such “short cuts” only manages to turn women off in the worst possible way.  

Unless you happen to be Rob Pattinson.  And trust me guys…you aren’t!

Women, on the other hand, have the added undertaking of becoming beautiful.  I know it seems simple, but even for the most beautiful woman in the world; there is the necessary chore of constant, painstaking maintenance.  Think of a woman as a car.  (Most men do anyway.)  We need to be constantly lubricated, detailed, occasional rust removal and parts overhaul. 

Just imagine the repercussions if a man showed up to our door and we had yet to fix our hair and do our makeup.  If we neglected to wax, shave or tweeze the countless body parts that require waxing, shaving and tweezing.  If we ignored our finger and toe nails, our chapped lips and un-moisturized skin, not to mention the simple tasks of showering, brushing our teeth, applying deodorant and dressing in something recently laundered.  It’s no wonder that it takes us hours to prepare for a single outing.  And I often wonder why we bother at all when we’re completely exhausted before even leaving the house.  Like I said before…thank God I don’t have to worry about dating anymore! 

Then again, I do have a handsome husband in the other room who just might appreciate it if I showered, shaved my legs, and slathered myself in fragranced lotion before climbing into bed tonight. 

I suppose that might not be a bad idea. 

Until the next time…I’ll be primping!

Copyright © 2000-2018, Erica Lucke Dean. All rights reserved. Any retranscription or reproduction is prohibited and illegal.
Posted on March 21, 2010 .