this (damn) old house

I have no TV. No lights in my bedroom. And it's completely dark going up the stairs...and in the upstairs hallway...and down to the basement. The circuits on the main level of my house have blown, including the one for the heat pump in the basement.

Let's just say, living in a 90 year-old haunted farmhouse has it's moments.

I have no idea what happened this time. I'd like to blame the ghost. No really, I'd like to blame the ghost because I suspect that would be the easiest way to fix it. Calling the ghost guys to get them to kindly ask the spirit to fix my electricity would be so much better than getting a crew of electricians out here to rewire the entire house. That right there is the scariest scenario I can come up with. 

And it would have to be the on the coldest night of the year.

I know...I'm spoiled, so say my friends and family living far north of here where the temperatures dip below zero on a regular basis. But unless your zero degree temperature comes with no indoor heat, I don't want to hear it. If you can pee without it freezing between your body and the bowl, I still win. I have no heat, and my space heaters are now rendered useless because the outlets are fried. I have 2 kerosine heaters running so I can feel like I'm huddled around a burning trashcan in the middle of a post apocalyptic movie. (No offense to anyone reading this from their spot huddled around a burning trashcan...you totally win this round.)

I guess I'm going to have to pause in my edits to shower and clean my house tomorrow before inviting the electrician to poke around my circuits. (I didn't mean it that way...get your mind out of the gutter. It's too cold for those kinds of jokes...really!)

Ok, it's never too cold for those kinds of jokes. Carry on.

Until the next time...I'll be freezing to death.

Copyright © 2000-2018, Erica Lucke Dean. All rights reserved. Any retranscription or reproduction is prohibited and illegal.
Posted on January 18, 2013 .