After last night’s response to my tampon dilemma, I’ve decided to become an advocate…no, an activist…for women. We need affordable feminine products. And we’re going to bite the heads off Barbies until we get them!

Ok…so maybe not the head biting, but the rest is true.

After reading all the comments last night, I discovered people were blaming everything from OPEC and global warming, to the Republicans and the drought for the rising cost of cotton. I also discovered there are crazy people out there who think feminine hygiene products are luxury items. Luxury? Really? So, if they’re a luxury, that suggests we can just choose not to use them.

Wouldn’t that be interesting?

Imagine if women everywhere just decided to boycott all feminine products. I don’t think I can write about how horrible…how frightening…that idea truly is. And I don’t think the men out there would survive a post apocalyptic society where women just gave up.

Talk about your zombie invasions!

Ok…enough about that. I got the heebee jeebees just thinking about it.

So, if not a boycott, then what do we do?

Sounds like we’re back to biting the heads off Barbie dolls. A scary band of PMSing women biting the heads from dolls in drug store parking lots? I don’t know…I sort of think I’ll come to my senses in a day or two…when the hormones wear off. I might be a little more rational by then.

I sure hope the world survives that long.

Until the next time…I’ll be moving (wish me luck!)

Ok, I’m going there. I am. You can’t stop me…don’t even try. So, if you’re easily offended, you might want to brace yourself. I’m about to cross a line I’ve always tried to avoid.

Sure…I write about PMS. A lot. But I never go there. I never actually bring up the dreaded feminine hygiene products. Well…that was then.

This is now.

I had to go buy tampons today, and I have just one thing to say. Are you really going to charge a woman on the edge eight dollars a box for tampons? Do you hear me? A. Woman. On. The. Edge! I mean, seriously…eight dollars? Do you have any idea how many of these things we go through? And it’s not like they’re woven out of precious metals…or even cashmere. We’re talking cotton.

Cotton!

I’m seriously considering a boycott…I’m not even close to letting this drop…but it’ll have to wait until next week. I’m not exactly myself right now. I’m likely to bite someone’s head off or something. Although, that might put a fright into them. I should go into the store with a Barbie doll and bite the head off as a show of…something. I don’t know what.

With my luck I’d get arrested for terroristic threats, or some crazy thing.

Then again…I suppose I’d have a valid excuse.

Until the next time…I’ll be biting the heads off imaginary Barbies.